Thursday, December 27, 2007

Back to Brazil

Yup. Really. No joke. We're going back February 11. After 13 long months we're going, but our situation is complicated.

Why so complicated? Well, we aren't sure about how long we'll be there. Honestly, there has been no joyous uproar about returning, because we still haven't gotten our long-term visas. We are working with our lawyer on a visa, but it hasn't happened yet. Five months ago we were told by said lawyer that we would be back in Brazil in a month, but we're still filling out paperwork and trying to get through maze of red tape.

So, what to do? We're praying and instead of just waiting here twiddling our thumbs, we've decided to go back on short-term visas. We'll be staying for six months again, or if our long-term visa gets through 2-4 years.

So everything is up in the air again, or maybe it's still - Everything is still up in the air again. Things are complicated, and to be honest I'm afraid.

Life is great here right now. It's safe. We have our family around. We're happily living with my brother, his wife, and a dear friend. The house always busy with friends. Our Christian friends are loving and supportive of us. We have an awesome new church family. Great jobs. Savings set aside. A soft bed. Fast internet. Health insurance. Taco Bell. Comfort. Ease.
Returning to Brazil stirs mixed feeling inside of me. I feel great joy and excitement about returning to our friends. I have missed so many people so much!I can't wait to teach again. I want to see how things have changed! I want to get back, but but I guess the long wait has stirred up fear.
I'm constantly running through the 'What Ifs.'
What if I feel out of place? What if we don't raise enough support? What if I am really a horrible teacher? What if I never get to finish all the schooling I want? What if we dry up all the savings?

What if we end up back in the US again in 6 months?

Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7
Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act. - Psalms 37:5
Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you... -Psalms 55:22

As for me, I am poor and needy, but the Lord takes thought for me.
You are my help and my deliverer; do not delay, O my God! - Psalms 40:17


No comments: